As I sit here with tear clouded eyes and heavy heart and feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders, I realize how much I have been back sliding. Yes, we are in a valley right now - a very low place. Yes, I know that God has a master plan far greater than anything I can imagine. But all of that doesn't stop me from feeling sorry for myself and for the situation that we are in. And honestly, I know it is during this time that I need to be turning to Him even more, and I have been doing the opposite - I have been trying to handle everything on my own. I haven't let God be the umbrella in my storm.
Psalm 147:5, "Great is our Lord and mighty
in power; his understanding has no limit." (NIV)
I know of the power of my King & Savior and I haven't been allowing Him to work His power and receive the glory and praise due His name. Things have been so difficult and stressful lately. It has been a while since my last post and a lot has changed. On June 24th, Aaron turned his resignation. His hand was really forced. With no severance and losing our housing, everything has taken a major hit - life in general, emotions, bank balances, and credit card debt. Once again the baby journey has been put on the back burner. In the last couple of weeks Aaron has gotten a temporary job that he absolutely hates working 6 days a week. I am truly grateful that he is doing this, but unfortunately it's still not enough to make ends meet. I just don't know what to do. For those of you that don't know, I do work a full time job. I am currently trying to find a job just working Saturdays to help financially. So far, I'm not having very much luck. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers that God would open that door and place where He wants me.
On a more positive note - Aaron and I visited a new church on Sunday and I really enjoyed it a lot. It is a contemporary service and style and I immediately felt at home. It is different having my husband sitting beside me during a worship service instead of preaching, but sometimes I just need him right there worshiping with me. It was very nice and we will definitely be back. Having lost my Ladies Bible Study and church friends, I really need a church home where I can truly worship, be fed, and hopefully meet and make true Christian friends - not fake people. Please be in prayer for that too. My heart and life truly needs a couple of good Christian friends. It would be even better if Aaron and I could find one or two couples to become friends with.
Well, I guess I better shut up for now! Thank you for reminding me Lord that You never leave me alone and that while I am waiting in this storm, I need to be diligently serving and worshiping You while I am waiting for this storm to pass! Much Love!!
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